Boundaries are the extents we must go through to protect ourselves from being hurt by our hurt relatives. A good boundary answers the question “How close can I get to a hurting family member and still show the relative love without being so close that I get hurt?” An example may be, “If my dad starts drinking at the party, I am going to get out of there.”
It isn’t enough to set a boundary; we also need to respect our boundaries. It is not the hurt relative’s job to respect our boundaries. It is not even necessary for the family member to know our boundaries. We respect our boundaries by making good on the ones we set.
If you have a family member that you are so close to that you get hurt, you may want to consider setting and keeping a boundary with him or her. It may take some practice to find the balance between love and protection.
It isn’t enough to set a boundary; we also need to respect our boundaries. It is not the hurt relative’s job to respect our boundaries. It is not even necessary for the family member to know our boundaries. We respect our boundaries by making good on the ones we set.
If you have a family member that you are so close to that you get hurt, you may want to consider setting and keeping a boundary with him or her. It may take some practice to find the balance between love and protection.
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